And, to challenge the status quo.
So, I changed my diet, and got my health and vitality back. It was the missing link I had been in search of since losing my mom.
Updated Jan 24, 2014
"The Roman Goddess I", watercolor on paper, 9x12, copyright Erin Rogers Pickering
There was no dream or vision this week though I did feel compelled to paint this statuesque goddess. I am unsure where I am headed with this, but I have a vague sense of a series beginning to form in my imagination. And, this may be a stepping stone.
The feeling is vague enough to be kind of scary. Scary, why? Not knowing why, not knowing where I'm headed, or if it will turn out right is unsettling... If it's not right it means it will be -wrong? So, it circles back to fear of failure I suppose.
And if I may, it is similar to starting a gluten-free diet. Where am I headed? Will it turn out right, or well? Will people understand? Is it worth it? Will I fail? I easily connect the two since I painted this while feeling the adverse effects of recent multiple trace glutenings. And, I ALWAYS doubt my work, my thoughts, and my actions when I am under the effects of gluten!
My art and my diet are both journeys - learning and exploring, where I actively make the choice to tune out the noise, face the fears, and follow my gut - literally and figuratively.
"Eye to Eye" watercolor on paper, 8x10, copyright Erin Rogers Pickering
The giraffe is finished and I feel like celebrating and crying (crying from joy, release and relief). I placed him on a shelf where we could view him, wiped my tears, and opened a bottle of wine.
Somehow, I turned a corner with this painting. A BIG corner. My demons were lurking but I faced them, and more importantly, got past them. The demons that try to derail the vision. The demons that make me question my ability. The demons that say there isn't enough time. The demons who torture me into thinking it is never quite finished.
It may be one little 8x10 watercolor painting but it is a giant step for me.
And, now it's time to start the next one!
Well, I got back on the proverbial horse, or shall I say Zebra? And created this right after the mess I made of the sheep. One bad painting does not a bad painter make.
This time I sat in my studio, quieted my mind, and let the muse direct me. My zebra series asked to be completed. In acrylic. On a wood panel. I respectfully listened and 2 hours later a finished painting looked back at me. I was drained but felt good. Deep down good. And the zebra seems pleased.
From now on, I will listen.