Food and Fairy Tales

Sneak peek of "Snow White" 8x10. watercolor & ink, copyright Erin Rogers Pickering

My daughter, a few months shy of four, loves fairy tales. Fairy tales, fables, myths – you name it.  Books, stories, videos, movies, toys. The fantasies and characters seem to swirl and dance through our home, ever present.  They peek and lurk around books, by the princesses found at every turn, and near the dragons, knights, castles, unicorns,  and - more princesses, that dictate our decor.

I was inspired to illustrate her as the princesses and heroines of her favorite stories so that the big "D" wouldn't be her sole source of how a princess can look.

Inspired and driven.

And as I started to create them, some with my own twist of knowing, and a pinch of my daughter’s wit and imagination, it occurred to me how many of the stories have food as an integral factor… Food that is the distraction, the downfall, the carrier of poison, or the evil lure.

Ah, and so my circle back to celiac and gluten.

To be continued…

Doorways

Doorways of France I, watercolor on paper, 8x10, copyright Erin Rogers Pickering

I've always had a thing for doorways... I like to draw them, photograph them, wondering what lays inside and they have played heavily in my dreams and nightmares.

Especially my nigtmares... There was a time I had so many 'door' nightmares that it inspired me to quit the job I had at the time. After months & months of similar nightmares they abruptly ceased when I gave notice.

Doorways hold a significant place in fairytales and fables representing entering the psyche. 

They are all over frequently used expessions... The eyes are the doorway to the soul; When opportunity knocks be sure to open the door; Shutting the door on the past; A foot in the door; Katy bar the door; Beating a path to your door.

I met my husband by opening the door both literally & figuratively. So quite appropriately we used one of my doorway paintings as the cover of his book, Patches of Grey.

You are never quite sure what you will find when entering a door but the outside sometimes shows a suggestion of what you will find within. Sometimes there are surprises. 

On April 17 2008 I stepped through the gluten-free doorway (well, actually I probably crawled through). I found a whole new world within myself and in my surroundings. It is an amazingly beautiful place to have ended up. Believing I was entering a place of limits - never imagining it would be filled with unlimited possibilities. 

The Blue Balloon - My Ah-Ha Moment

          "the blue balloon" ink and watercolor on paper, copyright erin rogers pickering

On April 17th 2008 our very-verbal-just-turned 2 yr old was playing with her stuffed animals, dolls and some remaining birthday balloons. All were at a tea party and were assigned a name or personality. She was going through the group affecting different voices when she got to the blue balloon, picked it up and said "I Mommy, I tired! I need to rest." all in a very exaggerated drawn out yawning voice.

That was my ah-ha moment! She was replaying what she had heard over and over. I knew in my heart of hearts that gluten was the culprit and going mostly gluten-free was a cop-out.
By the time my husband got home an hour later I was committed to going strictly gf. He asked if I was prepared with food and information? Nope, not really. Didn't matter - it was now or never. I would learn as I go. I had to do this for my daughter, for me, for my husband, for my life.
I made that committment to myself and my family exactly one year ago never imaging how great I would feel again. I have watched so many ailments drop away or improve, the most significant being migraines, bone pain and exteme fatigue. Those three alone have been more than worth the effort.

I have many thanks to give... to all the celiacs out there that told their story online and shared information on sites like Celiac.com, to Scott Adams for starting Celiac.com, to Shauna James Ahern for writing "Gluten Free Girl", for Bette Hagman for blazing a trail, to all the gf bloggers, for all the food manufacturers that make gf food in dedicated facilities, and all those that produce strictly gluten-free food.  Their help was and is immeasurable.

And, a special thanks to my beautiful daughter with her amazing ablilty to mimic and to my wonderfully supportive husband. I couldn't have done it without them.

What if?

Fantasy Crocuses, watercolor and ink on paper, copyright Erin Rogers Pickering

What if crocuses bloomed in a rainbow of pastels? Would the first flowers of spring spoil us? Too much too soon? Perhaps we would lose the appreciation for those first bursts of golden yellow set against the greys and almost colorless browns of the tail end of winter. Knowing that the lavendars and deep purples are just days away. And finding the delicacy of the scattered white crocuses. They appear so delicate yet they are damn strong to break through and bloom before winter is finished with us.

Sometimes I get caught up in the what ifs... What if my celiac was diagnosed 20 yrs ago? What if I didn't have celiac disease? Where would I be? What could I have accomplished? Not always the most productive way to spend my time. But, the positive side of this line of thinking is it surfaces what's important... where I really want to spend my time, and the appreciation that I do know now. It is pretty easy to follow food restrictions when you can see how bad it was and how good its become. And I can see it not as a struggle or loss - but a gain.

Through my art I can create a garden in whatever colors I imagine without losing an appreciation for the reality. Through my celiac experience I can create a life of good health, vitality and gratefulness and learn from where I have been.

Perfection on a Plate

copyright Erin Rogers Pickering, watercolor and ink on paper


I found perfection on a plate at BabyCakes in NYC.

Warm, cozy, inviting, charming, with such a friendly staff and - the cupcakes are out of this world! The gloomy, rainy day suddenly seemed warm and sunny. Guess it’s the light pink walls, soft glow of light, the divine baking scent and lovely staff. And knowing the cupcakes are gluten free so I could safely go crazy!

I had a chocolate brownie cupcake with vanilla frosting topped with delicate chocolate chips. Words can't adequately describe the velvety texture, the rich chocolate flavor, the sweet, but not overly so, divine frosting. Heaven on a plate. A perfect cupcake. I sketched it and then I ate it, giving me time to appreciate and savor the experience.

I have an extra appreciation for BabyCakes for having Pacific rice milk for my coffee... A truly gluten free rice milk.

If you are in NYC its worth the trip downtown.

BabyCakes NYC

My personal statement

Pears flour sack towel from my watercolor painting,
copyright Erin Rogers Pickering

Recently I joined a celiac forum and I was prompted, while creating my profile, for my personal statement. My first thought was I didn't have one. Then I realized something I have been telling myself for most of the last year, as a whole new world of good health and happiness opened up to me.

"I am gluten free, therefore I can..."

Wow. "I can" Those are powerful words!

I am gluten free therefore I can...
Live without migraines
Eat chocolate
Drink red wine
Be without bone pain
Keep up with my daughter
Face the day with a smile
Go barefoot
Wear heels
Bake – I CAN bake
Bake bread, muffins, cookies, cupcakes that are tasty to everyone
Run again
Paint, Draw, Create
See possibility
Think clearly
Feel joy
Feel healthy
Be energetic

This list could go on and on. Because when I went gluten free I truly hit the jackpot!



Click here for my FREE printable Gluten Free Blessing

Running

                              "Running" ink on paper, from my sketchbook, copyright Erin Rogers Pickering

I ran regularly for over 15 yrs. I usually ended a run by icing my knees, and often taking a nap. One 6k race I collapsed at the finish line. People asked why I ran. My answer was always the same… "because I can".

I couldn't describe the high... The release, the freedom, the joy, the order it created in my thoughts, finding resolutions, or making peace with what couldn't change. Being grounded, alive, refreshed. It was my moving meditation even as it became more and more difficult to do.

Until Sunday it had been over 4 years since I went for a run. Broken ankle, torn calf, surgery, back problems, sciatica, foot pain, joint pain, bone pain and constant fatigue made it seem like running would forever be the thing I used to do. I didn't realize until recently how much gluten consumption was destroying my ability to run.

Until Sunday. We went as a family to the cross-country path at the high school.  And I ran. It never felt so good. I didn't go very far but I learned a long time ago that the tortoise always gets to the finish line. It is the beginning again.  And I am still on a high from that run.

I run because I am healthy
I run because I am gluten free.
I run because I can!

Surviving Gluten

"Vieques Sunset", acrylic on canvas, copyright Erin Rogers Pickering

I'm back. I have passed through the black hole of gluten effect.

It was if a switch was flipped late yesterday afternoon – and the skies parted. It reminded me of the painting I did of a Vieques sunset… the sun splashing through the clouds; streaks of color breaking through the grey. Whenever I look at this painting I am on that beach again... Relaxed, peaceful, and in awe of the beauty of the sky.

Today I feel like a million dollars. It was a rough few days but I am that much more appreciative of all that I have. I woke up happy, grateful, energized and pain free.
Gluten free is a beautiful thing.